Masking at Work

The workplace mask is heavy for any neurodivergent person, but for women it sits on top of a gendered script: be warm, agreeable, low-maintenance, never 'difficult.' So you're doing your actual job AND a full-time performance of being effortlessly fine. That double shift is a fast track to burnout — and most of it is invisible.

My work mask

• [ ] Forcing eye contact and a friendly affect I don't feel
• [ ] Hiding sensory distress (lights, noise, open-plan)
• [ ] Not asking for what I need so I don't seem difficult
• [ ] Over-preparing and overworking to 'pass'
• [ ] Masking overwhelm until I crash at home

What it costs by Friday

How drained does the masking leave me by week's end?

Rate from 0 (A little) to 10 (Empty): ____

Where the cost shows up (burnout, no capacity left for life, dreading Mondays)

______________________________________________

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What would actually help

You can ask for these — formally as accommodations, or quietly as preferences. What would lighten the load?

The changes that would help (noise-canceling, written instructions, async comms, breaks, WFH days, quieter space)

______________________________________________

______________________________________________

______________________________________________

One thing I'll stop masking or ask for

The one I'll actually try first

______________________________________________

______________________________________________

Passing is unpaid labor: Performing neurotypical all day is work you're not paid for, stacked on the work you are. Accommodations aren't special treatment — they're what let you do your real job without burning out.

Go deeper

Ready for more? These lessons pick up where this worksheet leaves off.

• Work, Accommodations, and Advocacy, from The Autistic Woman. The autistic woman at work — masking, the open-office tax, the disclosure decision, accommodations to ask for, and finding work that fits.
• Unmasking, Safely, from The Autistic Woman. Unmasking isn't all-or-nothing or always safe — a neuroaffirming guide for autistic women: the dimmer not the switch, safety mapping, and grief.
• ADHD at Work, from The Adult ADHD Course. Why ADHD work struggles are about fit, not ability, and how accommodations unblock your strengths.
• Autistic Burnout, from The Autistic Woman. What autistic burnout really is, how it differs from depression, why it hits women after decades of masking, and what recovery actually requires.